Jonas 的个人资料MC Delta T Space照片日志列表更多  |  工具 帮助 |
|
|
7月14日 Mid-summerJust a quick personal update after a huge non-personal update and months of nothing... After almost 2 months of unemployment, I am now working for "the Man" at Patrimoine Canadian Heritage. I'm moving files and stuff. It's kinda fun, I guess and I get valuable government work experience and stuff, not to mention: loads of cash! In September, I'm going to Montreal to study Economix at Concordia. I'm really looking forward to that. It looks like I might not get all that money from the government, though, on the account of I've only got a 3-year Bachelor's degree from Ontariario. But hopefully, I can get into co-op and I can work part-time and get a bank loan. Also, my program might take 3-years, after all, instead of two, but there would be an eight month gap, two light 12-credit terms and one Part-time term. I'm going to try to find a way of doing my MBA in Québec too, like at Concordia, or in Newfoundland. If I do it in Québec, though, I would be entitled to loads of money from the government. I am liking the summer, although, it's a little cloudier and rainier than I was hoping. I had a gf, briefly, but I found we didn't have much in common, and I just wasn't into the things she was into and I was just not that into her, so I broke up with her. I'm more confident about getting chix though. It might take time, but I've got time! Anyway, I'm prolly not going to write in this blog as often as I was hoping because each time I write a major entry, I take it sooo seriously and write sooo much. Like my last entry was over 2000 words, which is more than I usually write for school. Well, Keep trucking, y'all! ~ Jonas "THE STEAMROLLER" Graham, B.A. 4月28日 So this is rock bottom?Good evening, y'all! I've been feeling great lately! Technically, I "hit rock bottom"! My job finally ended so I'm "between jobs" and I've been spending a lot of time drinking and stuff, but despite that, I'm holding up all right. I had a little money in the bank and I got my federal income tax refund so I'm doing alright, financially. I also applied for E.I. so I should get a few benefits from that. That might take a while, though... I've decided to make this blog friends-only because I tend to say things that are a tad controversial and I tend to be very open about things that perhaps prospective employers and stuff should not be aware of. This was actually a bit of a difficult decision on the account of I love to be very open about myself and I don't care what people think, but perhaps I shouldn't say so much when I have something to lose. But some of my ideas are so awesome that I want to share them with the world and have randoms search it, but for that I might want to have a separate space that's public but that will be for later. For now, I'll just feel free to say what I want! Yee-haaaaaw! Anyway, I don't smoke weed, anymore. I just find it boring and stupid and it makes me itchy. Anyway, I love the springtime! I'm starting to think that if I was feeling kinda blue before, it has more to do with the weather than with y'all-know-who or my job or whatever. I've actually been looking back at old blog entries and I've noticed a pattern. I often feel pretty blue in the winter and then great in the springtime. Perhaps I have what they call "Seasonally Affected Disorder". But I don't think that's really a disorder. I think the real disorder is the fact that our ancestors moved to cold countries like this, in the first place. Many animals only live in certain climates. For example, there are no monkeys in Canada or Québec. (Could you blame them?) And it's only natural we feel a little helpless in the winter-time - in Agrarian or hunting-gathering societies, there is a period between the last possible harvest and the first possible plantation where you really can't do much to affect your outcome. You're basically relying on your skills from the year before. If you were a good farmer, you'll live. If not, you'll starve! So, it's only natural that you kind of feel retrospective during this season. i.e. Did I save up enough food? Did I even plant enough crops? Oh! If only I hadn't been so lazy all summer... You can only pray that you make it through the winter before you can change anything so you feel helpless and scared. Now, in modern times, we work all year round so there are things we can do to affect our survival in the winter, but I believe that this feeling is instinctual by now so that we naturally tend to feel this when we see the winter sky or feel the cold winter air. Of course, there is such a period in every climate, but in colder climates, it's longer. I seriously want to move down south somewhere. Y'all can have Canada if y'all want, but I'm out of here... Oh! I've also got a new friend now who drags me out to go clubs and stuff. It's fun to go out and do stuff and have fun. OK. Admittedly, that was a stupid comment. Anyway, so I've been "clubbing" a bit lately. I like clubs that play pop music especially 80s tunes and "glam" rock because I can really get into it. I'm not that into modern pop because it's mostly hip-hop and stuff. Hip-hop is all rhythm and no melody. Also, basically, the only thing to do with hip-hop music is to find a girl and "grind" with her. That's basically what everybody else is doing and that seems like the only way you can really have fun. I don't like it when the only way you can have fun is just to hook up with some random And I think "grinding" is stupid. I don't like to rub myself against a girl's ass. It just doesn't appeal to me. I don't find it arousing at all and I prefer to see her eyes anyway. It's just soooo boring. I probably won't find a chick that I really like at a club anyway. I'm more likely to find a girl by doing something I really like and then noticing a girl doing the same. I like to get to know a girl's personality more. I'm not that picky about looks but if that's all I have to go on, shucks... But I like to be pushed into trying new things. Like Techno Music. Last night, me and my friend went out to this concert and had a lot of fun. Techno dancing is different. It's all about expression. There's less pressure to hook-up. You just go out and try something and yea... sometimes you'll look like a dork but everybody does and it gives you more of an opportunity to see people's personalities. Anyway, I never really thought I would enjoy it that much but fancy that! I did. Who would have thunk it? Anyway, I got accepted to Concordia. So it looks like that's where I'll be going next year. I'll be doing another bachelor's degree since my first degree wasn't honours, I cannot get into grad school. This time I'm doing Honours in Economics. There's a co-op program. Alas, I don't know if I was accepted yet. I think even if I'm not accepted straight off the bat, though, they'll probably give me a chance to prove myself in first year by achieving a certain average or something. I really want to do co-op because it will be easier to get a high-paying summer job and I'll gain some great relevant work experience. I plan to maintain a GPA of at least 3,7 (A-), anyway. Speaking of which, Concordia, like many Québexican universities, uses a standard GPA scale like universities in the best country in the world. A is 4, B is 3, C is 2, D is 1 and E and F are both 0. Plus or minuses are given by +/- 0,3. uOttawa used it's own 10-point GPA system. My GPA was 7,5, which was between B+ (7) and A- (8) so it's basically equivalent to 3,5 on a standard GPA scale. I'm really going to enjoy this. It's going to give me another chance to really shine and impress professors and co-op employers and I'll really get involved in a lot of activities and stuff. Plus, I'll get a season's pass to 6 Fags La Ronde and go almost every weekend. I love amusement parks! It's a pretty good deal. $92,58 with taxes (about 905 Mexican Pesos). I can't wait! This is going to be soooo much fun! By the way, I'm starting to look for a room, so if anybody knows of any good rooms available in NDG (within 10 minutes walking distance to Loyola) for $400 per month all-inclusive (or $300 per month w/o hydro or furnishings in the room or $250 with absolutely nothing included), keep me posted. Also, since I've already got a Bachelor's degree, I'm considered financially independent so my parent's income isn't taken into account when I apply for loans and bursaries. Tuition at Concordia is under $3k and I stand to get about $3500 in bursaries alone so that should cover my tuition and then some. Basically, I just have to pay for living expenses. But apparently, tuition in Québec is going to be unfrozen so it will increase by $50 per semester starting in Fall 2007 but that's not so bad. I would only have to pay $650 more for my degree (if they count the summer) and I'll probably be able to get more money from the government, anyway. Anyway, my plan is now to do another Bachelor's at Concordia (which should take about two years) and then an MBA at St. Mary's, Dalhousie or Memorial (2 years) and a Graduate Certificate in Systems Science at the University of Ottawa. So, in total, I'll be spending another 5 years in school so I should be ready to emigrate and start my career before I'm 26, so that's not so bad. I may get a little bit of debt. MBAs are expensive and if I do mine outside Québec, I just get loans - no bursary. By the way, have y'all heard of Mika? He's an amazing pop singer that my mom introduced me to, oddly enough. Some of his music videos are on Youtube so I suggest y'all check them out! I've embedded them here for your enjoyment (and so I could try out embedding video in Live Spaces)! Grace Kelly Love Today Anyway, enough about me! I might write a non-personal entry tonight or sometime soon so y'all can look forward to that... Have fun, y'all! ~ Jonas "THE STEAMROLLER" Graham, B.A. 3月11日 The coming of summer...Dear friends, The title of this post is inspired by a book I was supposed to read for school called "The Coming of Winter". It's about miserable people living miserable lives in New Brunswick. (Figures). Winter is often represents depression, despair and misery so if winter is coming, things are getting worse. But if summer is coming... things are looking up! Indeed things are looking up. It's starting to get slightly warmer and Easter is only a few weeks away. I feel much happier about my future. I will probably study economics a bit at Concordia then go on for an MBA at St. Mary's or Dalhousie in Halifax. Neither university requires management experience which is great because how am I going to get two or three years of management experience within the next couple of years?! Also, I don't really feel like going to law school. Many lawyers don't actually make all that much money because everybody wants to be a lawyer and the market is saturated and it's not a particularly ethical profession. So now I'm excited about my future and I can look forward to that rather than looking back at my past because I can't stand to face my future. I don't know if I've mentioned this before but I talk differently now. Many people who know me from before might not understand but I talk in a slight southern drawl now. I like it. It's who I want to be. Shucks! It's who I am. Some people are like: "You should just be yourself! You should not try to change who you are!" but I beg to differ! You can change who you are. Why not? Think about it: imagine if you are an alcoholic - should you just "be yourself" and accept your alcoholism as part of "who you are" or should you try to change? Just "being yourself" is a dangerous game. If people don't change, they can't improve. I say, instead, "be who you want to be" and just like the US air force says: "Be all you can be!" Of course, you should not try to be someone else just to please others but if you really want to change for your own sake, go for it! I try to live by this philosophy. The accent is part of who I am. I'm not trying to escape my Canadian heritage nor am I doing it to impress people but this is the way I like to talk. This is the way I chose to talk. Not many people understand this but, MJ, this girl from work, understands this completely. She actually verbalized this in such an awesome way. I wish I had thought of that myself. She says that it is like I create myself like a work of art. I read a little bit on Kierkegaard and this seems to correspond to his concept of the aesthetic life. Now, Kierkegaard did not think this was the highest form of living and neither do I but I believe there's nothing wrong with expressing yourself the way you like by changing certain aspects. I mean: people dye their hair all the time... Why can't you change your accent? Stephen Colbert did that but he did the opposite of me. He was ashamed of his southern accent so he started talking like a northerner. Of course, my parents don't like it so out of respect for them, I talk Canadian with them. I guess it's just like immigrant families who get offended when kids speak English at home. It's understandable and you've got to honour your father and mother (it's the 4th commandment)... I took some caffeine earlier and it was great. I love caffeine! It's just such an innocent drug but soooo fun! I think I'm going to take it more often. I'm not going to get gluttonous or abuse it or anything but I enjoy being so energized so I'm going to do this more often. I went to a CCO event earlier. It was great. There was Eucharistic adoration. I think a lot of people don't get this. I've heard people saying that it's kinda like idolatry but alas it's not. Jesus did say that the bread was indeed his body! So Christ is actually present in the Eucharist. Now, this is not to say that Christ is not present outside the Eucharist. Jesus is with you all the time. But the beauty of Eucharistic adoration is that it is a great opportunity to focus on Jesus and direct your thoughts and your heart towards him and to really feel his presence, in a very concrete way. I also had the opportunity to go to confession. It feels like quite a relief. There are plenty of things I was ashamed of in my life but it feels good to just let go and start fresh. I've put some more money towards my mutual funds. I took the opportunity to invest a huge lump sum shortly after losing a bit of money. That's the way to go: buy low - sell high! Shucks! I'm quite passionate about saving money and stuff but I hope y'all don't think I'm idolizing money or anything. I just realized that it's important to handle finances well because even if you make lots of money, it's so easy to lose it all. Some people manage to live well on less money than others do on more money. One thing I've learned is to buy quality things even if it costs more. For example, I used to buy headphones (the type that cover your whole ears) at about $20 per pair and they kept breaking on me. Now, I bought a pair for $70 and I got the extended warranty. They did break once so far but I just walked in and gave them my earphones and phone number and got a new pair within a few minutes. It's great. Also, last year I bought a laptop for $700 but it's slow and does not have all the features I want and most importantly, it's BROKEN and the warranty is expired. I just ordered a new laptop from Dell that will be faster, have a longer lasting battery, be able to burn DVDs and I got the Complete Care package. It costed $300 more but it means that if it breaks within the next three years, EVEN IF IT IS MY FAULT, they will fix it. This is incredible. If I spill something on it or I drop it, whatever... I'm covered! But do you always come out ahead by spending more money? Of course not! A lot of companies charge more for "image". Take Nike for example: they spend millions on advertising to tell you that you're cool if you wear Nikes and then pass the cost on to you so that you're paying Nike to tell you that you're cool. I don't need Nike to tell me I'm cool. Do y'all? Also, sometimes if you wait and buy a quality product once they've come out with something better, you come out ahead. For example, I bought a first-gen iPod Nano for about $130 once they released the second-gen Nano. It's still a quality product but they've just made an even more high-quality product now but I don't need the best. I'll just settle for great. Thank you! Also, food is never really an asset. Once you've eaten it you're not going to be that disappointed that you got the cheaper no-name brand stuff. Even if the premium stuff is better, for something that you'll only enjoy for a few minutes anyway, is it really worth it? Also, I've done some thinking about girls. (Could you blame me?) I find I have been too desperate in my life. I shouldn't just take any opportunity that I get. I should do us both a favour and only go out with girls that I really like. This is kinda difficult, though, because once it seems like a girl likes me, I try to think of excuses to like her and then I can't tell whether I really like her or whether I like her just cause she likes me. It's really confusing. Maybe I should just go for a girl that I like and be bold even if she shows no interest in me (at first, hehe). Another thing that's been on my mind: I wish I had impressed more people. I need references to get into grad school (both academic and job references) and I've realized that I haven't really "wow"ed anyone. I always seem to have chosen the path of least resistance. I never really put in a lot of effort to do well in anything. I'm naturally quite smart but instead of using my intelligence, working hard and excelling, I've often just used it to get by with as little effort as possible. I've often not participated in classroom discussions because I had not done the readings and stuff and so I haven't really gotten noticed by professors. Now, I regret this. There's still time though but this has been a real wake-up call for me. It should also be a warning to y'all. Whether y'all are in school or working, remember: everything counts! Put effort into a class that you don't particularly like or a job that isn't exactly your dream job. Try to impress people. Don't settle for just "getting by". If things come too easily, try to excel at what you do or try to do something more challenging! It's kinda like the parable of the talents. Don't be the wicked slave! Do all you can with what you've got! Actually, this reminds me of something: there's nothing wrong with ambition. I used to think that wanting to do something big was really selfish. But no! God wants us to "be all we can be". He wants us to do the most with what he has given us. Don't be afraid of doing something that is going to benefit you because of the great talents God has given you. Just remember that these talents come from God and you've got to give back by doing God's will with the gifts you earn with your gifts. Being rich, in and of itself, is not a bad thing. I love this line in the ad for St. Mary's U: "I want to make gazillions and give it all away!" Why would you sell yourself short and then you won't be able to do as many good deeds for others? Anyway, y'all... I've got to go to bed soon. I'm already losing an hour's sleep because of Daylight Savings time and this caffeine is starting to wear off... G'night! Sincerely, Jonas "THE STEAMROLLER" Graham, B.A. 3月4日 Looking forward / Looking backDear interweb friends and/or stalkers, A lot has happened for me recently... In case I haven't mentioned it already, I have (finally) moved out. I am now living with my friend Sean in Hull along with Emma (a roommate we found through Craigslist). The place is great! The building isn't the prettiest (from the outside) but the apartment is great. The living room is pretty big (for an apartment). It's about 10 minutes by bus from downtown Ottawa or old-Gatineau and they come rather often. I can take the 67 or 77. I remember when I lived in Aylmer and I had to wait for the bus downtown and I would see two or three 67s or 77s go by before the 42 or 43 would come. Now I'm taking advantage of that! There are beautiful hardwood floors (that are fun to slide across) and concrete walls so the sound is pretty isolated. Appliances, heat and hard water are included. We've also got hi-speed cable interweb. There's a dépanneur right next door and I think one of the clerks kinda likes me. (Could you blame her?) I used to think living on my own would be so difficult but now that I'm actually doing it, I realize that it's really easy! We keep the place clean and even though I have to take the bus to go grocery shopping, it's not too difficult because I can usually fit all my groceries in my pack-sac and one re-usable shopping bag. It's more expensive than living at home because I have to buy my own groceries and stuff but I manage. I'm financially independent. I have enough money to cover all my expenses, still have fun (I'm not a big drinker or an avid cinema-goer or anything) and still put some money away towards mutual funds and give to charity. I'm still working at the CSB call centre. I'm It is getting kinda boring but I think that's ending pretty soon and now that I have a security clearance, it shouldn't be too difficult to find a new job (I'm already looking) and I have enough savings to cover next month's rent at least and I'll file my taxes soon so I can get my refund ASAP and I am eligible for EI. I am still very interested in finance. I met with a financial advisor who inspired me to invest long-term in hi-risk equities so now, in addition to my balanced fund, I've taken out a new Global Titans fund that invests in USA, Canada, Europe, Asia and the world. My fund is currently down but in the long-term, I stand to gain (A LOT). The financial advisor told me that the key is to own the means of production (Marx would hate me!) and to start young (which I am doing). Equities are always better than bonds because with bonds, you own someone's liabilities but with equities, you own someone's assets. However, it seems that a lot of financial planning is geared towards other people's dreams which are, generally, retiring young and spending years and years traveling and stuff. I am not that big on traveling and I plan to retire at 68 at which point I would have maybe 5 years and then I'd die. I would like to take a few 3-month breaks in my 50s and 60s to travel a little bit with the wife, but I am not going to put everything off until I retire. It seems that a lot of people want to get things over with so they can get a break. I want to find a job that I enjoy doing so that I wouldn't mind working there well into my 60s. And I want to find a job with lighter hours so I can work a 4-day week. I also find it silly how Canadians often save up their money so they can escape the cold and go to Cuba or something for ONE WEEK per year. Why not live somewhere that's decently WARM all year round so you don't have to put up with such constant misery for ONE SMALL BREAK? I'm still planning on leaving the People's Republic of Quebexico and Soviet Canuckistan and moving to somewhere warm. I will consider many possibilities. I'm not too fond of Europe (it's the old world) I will not limit myself to "first world" countries. I could probably learn Spanish and I wouldn't mind living in Mexico just so long as, between me and the wife, we could earn a million Pesos a year, which is not that difficult. By the way, Pesos are now the official international currency on this blog instead of US Dollars. Remember: a Peso is worth just under 10 cents US. I want to leave before I'm 30 but immigration is sooo difficult. Even poor countries are picky. It seems like nobody wants immigrants and you're stuck in the country that you're born in, usually. Immigration quotas are often credential-based and I know that a General B.A. just isn't going to cut it. So it looks like I have to go back to school. I now have two paths before me (I already applied to both): Law/MBA at Université de Sherbrooke or Economics at Concordia then a Graduate Diploma in Systems Science from the University of Ottawa. The Law/MBA thing is probably a better path career-wise but it would take soooo long (4 years + 1 year for my law license) and I would be soooo bored and lonely. I'm worried that because I don't speak French as a first language, I would have trouble communicating with my peers and so I wouldn't fit in. Plus, I don't really want to be a lawyer. I never did. I don't think it's a very ethical profession and I think EVERYBODY wants to be a lawyer so the market is saturated, but then again, in the best country in the world and in Mexico, lawyers are still paid a fortune. I could easily make a starting salary of half a million (Pesos) and with that money I could easily start a family but I might have to put that off till I'm 27 or 28 or so. I don't know if I want to put that off so much though. I'm all about chastity and all that but geeeeeeeeeze! I don't want to be a 30-year-old virgin! This seems to be my mom's preferred plan for me. She says that even if I don't want to do something, it may be best to do it anyway for the greater good. That's kinda true. I mean: just look at the biblical Jonah... He sure didn't want to go to Ninevah... But alas, that was his mission. Shucks! Still, this is different. My mom's not God. Yea, I'll consider it, but I'm 20, I'm living on my own and I'm financially independent. I don't have to listen to my mother anymore. The other option is the Economics / Systems Science thing. This would only take me about four years and the last year is kinda part time, but it's humiliating because they are probably going to make me take another Undergraduate degree just so I can get into the Graduate program. But perhaps I can switch into an M.A. program in Economics at Concordia and then I'll have a Master's and a Graduate degree. Shucks! I just thought of that just now but it's too late to apply for that now for Fall admission but I can probably apply in the fall. We'll see how that goes... Shucks! My goals are to get out of Canada and get married. My dad's saying that I should be flexible and stuff. Even if it takes a long time, I should stick it out. But WHY? So I can be a good lawyer? I don't care. That's not my goal! That's just a means to an end. I won't give up the ends to suit the means! Of course, as a Christian, I should be responsive to what God wants but I don't know what he wants. Somehow, I think I am destined for something big and I don't mean that in the way like we are all destined for big things but I mean seriously, that I will be responsible for a HUGE change in the world. I don't mean that to boast. I think there will be a lot of challenges ahead of me and I won't necessarily enjoy them but I feel that I have to do something BIG. There are all sorts of signs pointing towards this but I just don't know what it is yet. I have a feeling it will involve living a very public life, though. Somebody at work even mentioned it to somebody else, about me. He said that they had the feeling I am going to do something big in life. Maybe that's why I should spend so much time in school. I need a lot of preparation for this. Whatever it is. I wish I knew what this was but I shall find out, in time, I guess... And I realized that whatever I do in life, I will be happy. I realized this when praying. I decided that I will do whatever God wants of me but I was questioning: "Is it too much to ask that I can be happy?" and I got my answer: No. No it isn't. So I shouldn't worry about it... I'll gather as much information about these programs as I can, for now, and I will make my decision, this summer. Either way, despite "wasting" my time by doing a general B.A. first, now that I have a B.A., I am considered "financially independant" for student aid purposes so my parents' income would not be factored in when the national Government decides how much bursaries and student loans I get. So if I go back to school, I am bound to get at least $5k (or about 47,5k Pesos) in bursaries and another $4k (or 38k Pesos) in Student loans. Tuition in Quebexico is less than $3500 (or 33 300 pesos) per year, so that's not bad. And I'm not afraid of taking on debt as long as it will help me secure a good financial future. In the meantime, there's no reason why I can't enjoy the ride. I should get a new gf. I almost went out with this girl from work. It was pretty clear, at first, that she was obsessed with me, but we disagree on practically everything! Shucks! She is cute, though, and eligible for Mexican citizenship! I just have got to meet more girls. I just shouldn't be so shy. I should think of any excuse to go talk to a girl and w/e. Probably, 90% of girls I won't like enough to go out with but the more attempts I make, the more likely I am to succeed... It's going to be difficult though because I'd have to have a girl follow me along for such a looong ride. I wouldn't mind getting married before I'm done University but I still want to finish whatever I have to do to get out of Canada. I am sticking to my guns about the whole pony tail, glasses and silliness thing though if I fall in love with a girl who doesn't meet the description, I might be willing to compromise. It might be easier to get married once I get out of Canada because then I don't have to convince a Canadian girl to pack up and leave (and all Canadian girls foolishly LOVE the Winter for some odd reason - I suppose it's Masochism). Once I leave Canada, I might find a local girl who is quite content living in the south. Still, if I find a girl willing to share my journey with me, why wait? I am ready for marriage NOW. Just, I am not settling down any time soon. Oh. In case y'all are wondering, I still miss Teresa. But just as a person. I think I might write her soon. I realized that I am sad about it, because I was looking for marriage and I knew that she was marriage-bound but maybe just cause her mom was pressuring her so much. Perhaps she wanted to go out with me specifically so she could avoid marriage for now. I don't think she wants to get married anytime soon. I still do. But just not to her. At the time, I realized this and it was just a matter of time before I broke up with her, anyway. But I still think she's gorgeous though. We're just not going down the same path. I should not worry about getting a girl so much that it holds me back from goals (especially leaving Canada). If I keep on going down my path, I am bound to find someone along the way. I shouldn't worry so much about being single and start a serious relationship with a girl that I couldn't see myself spending my life with just so that I don't feel lonely. I should just focus on finding a girl who is right for me and it won't be easy (especially with the emigration thing). So, it is pretty clear now: I am shifting priorities. Emigration is my FIRST priority. Marriage is now second. It WAS vice-versa before. Well, anyway, bring it on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Looks like I'm in for the long haul now but it will be fun and there's definitely light at the end of the tunnel. Pray for me! ~ Jonas "THE STEAMROLLER" Graham, B.A. 11月4日 Living it up... 80s style!Evening y'all? Guess which mofo got his contract extended until March? Faaaaaaaaaabulous!!!!!!!!!!!! Fucking A! Some weeks may be part time, but at least it's something. I'm anticipating making at least another $4000 between now and then... And my friend Corey will be there with me... Best Neighbors EVER!!! I'm going to Mexico in early December, but my taking time off is nooooo problem at that time... I'm quite messed up on the account of I'm not sober on the account of I'm celebrating! I'm pretty tired on the account of I've been waking up before 6 for the last few days on the account of I couldn't sleep... Yeee-haaaaaw... Hey, speaking of girls... I was thinking about something... Rather than a chick that's almost 3 years older than me, I should go for a chick that's 5-6 years younger but before you start thinking: "sick", just note that I DON'T think of 14-15 year olds that way at all, I'm just saying that I will probably not find the love of my life for another few years... I'm not going to go and ask out a 14 year old, right now, even if it's still legal... Man, one of the reasons that I didn't go straight to grad school right away, after my B.A. is that I needed time to "find myself". I found having time out of school certainly did help and now I can consider myself found and now I'm very enthusiastic about my future and the more I wait the more excited I get, which is a good thing for me because I could definately use some excitement to get me going! I guess I could also use a gf right about now though to share in my successes and be my better half! Man, anybody want to see the Borat movie? I was about to see it tonight, but it shwas sold out! 10月18日 Sloppy seconds...mdr... I just can't get enough of talking about myself so here's a bit more about what's going on with me. Being a University graduate and 20-years-old, I've decided now that I'm really an adult and so I have gotten more involved with the community as an adult. I've started volunteering for Saint Vincent de Paul - it's a Catholic charity that helps the poor in our community. I've also become a member of the NDP at the federal level and the ADQ at the national level. I can kinda identify with the ADQ but the NDP, I disagree with a lot but I disagree with them less than any other federal political party that is active in my district. Anyway, as a member, I have voting privileges and they're more likely to listen to me than to a non-member. I plan to take advantage of this and constantly give them my opinions about everything. I also noticed that I'm feeling rather lonely these days. Work is not like school. You don't take your break at the same time as everybody else; you have to be there, doing your work for 40-50 hours per week instead of 15; you can't get away with chatting with your colleagues when you're supposed to be working, unlike in class where you can chat when the professor is talking, there are no "clubs", etc. On the flip side, there's no homework and lots of money! I did get the chance to socialize with people from my training group and we're kinda tight. Some of us went drinking last Friday. It was kinda fun. But it's just not the same as school. *sigh* It doesn't help that Joel's gone to Mexico, either. I talk to him all the time, but if he was here, he'd probably be dragging me along to all sorts of crazy parties and stuff but alas, he's partying in Mexico, instead. Do y'all ever reminesce on good times and they make you worry that you will never ever have such a good, happy time ever again? I do. Especially in the Fall. I know I have a lot of exciting adventures to look forward to, but when I think of WYD for example, I have this strange feeling deep down inside that I'll never have so much fun, again. Same deal with Teresa, when I think back to when I was going out with her, I worry that I'll never get another gf again. I know this is just silly, but sometimes I wish I could just hold on to these past happy times because I'm scared to death that I'll never be happy again. Seriously, I think it totally has to do with the weather in Autumn... I miss the summer. Anyway, La Ronde isn't closed... yet! We still have two more weekends! Can any of y'all drive?! We can maybe get a crew together and high-tail it to the 514! Drivers would be compensated. There's also Saunder's farm... Maybe we can do both. Seriously! Leave a comment or e-mail me... 10月17日 Outside the boxI haven't written here for a while... A lot of stuff has been happening lately that has been keeping me busy. Namely, getting a job. That's right, y'all! I am now officially employed. It's a temporary position but it's not bad. I work in a Call centre and deal with Canada Savings Bond stuff. Mainly the "Payroll Savings Program": a program by which employees can have a certain amount of money taken off their paycheques each payday and invested in Canada Savings Bonds. It's actually a pretty good way for people who lack self-discipline (like myself) to save money. Except that I'm not part of the program myself. I got the job through an agency and I don't think they offer the program. I've used some of the money to buy a bunch of things that I have been wanting for a while but have been putting off due to lack of funds: iPod, Cell Phone, etc. I'll also pay down my debt a bit. It's at $1000 but it's a decent interest rate so I'll actually keep some of it until next year. Maybe like $400 or so. I also might join Joel for a few weeks, south of south of the border. You know what they say about Mexico: "What happens in Mexico ... usually ends up on the internet!" I also have a way of making gigantic tasks into "priorities". My fascism post, for example. I wanted to get that done before writing anything else in my blog. Well, guess what?! It's finally done! All 8000 words! I probably should break down big projects into smaller tasks or something. That's always been something I've struggled with. It's "my struggle". Hehe. Speaking of the fascism post, I fear that a lot of people might not understand. Especially if CSIS or CIA people read it. I'm not actually a fan of Hitler or Mussolini. I just hate how we are such a narrow-minded culture that there are things we won't even touch. Like, there are so many people who are ready to admit that failed political philosophies such as communism were just "not really given a chance" or that despite the misery and suffering they caused many people, they have a few redeeming qualities, but people will equate something like "fascism" to "pure evil". Which is, of course, completely false. Many elements of fascism were wrong such as racial intolerance and stuff but certain things such as looking towards the collective good instead of one's self-interest or class-interest were not such bad ideas. Before you put me on any sort of "watch list" read the post! It's full of many good ideas. And besides, it's totally in line with my personality, as described on my profile: "I like challenging the views of the status quo and being unique among any set." i.e. I love to rock the boat! Speaking of thinking outside the box, that might make for an interesting show on the Discovery Channel or something. They could call it "outside the box" and showcase people who've come up with unconventional ideas or solutions in many fields such as politics, economics, business, etc. and their successes. Shucks! I'd watch! Anyway, enough about fascism. How has Jonas been doing? I'm good, I guess. I've been feeling kinda blue, lately. I guess everybody feels sad sometimes, so I'm not going to make a big deal of it and threaten suicide or go on prozak or anything. Part of it, I think, is a delayed reaction to my break-up. As you may or may not know, it was not my decision. But she decided based on the fact that she was picking up signs that I didn't really "love" her. And she may have been right. I feel insecure when I'm single, but I thought I would feel super secure with a gf, but I actually felt more insecure, and I guess that was unatural. And I felt like I was just doing things, sometimes, to "impress her". Not even that, but to "score points" with her, like she was my mother or something. That isn't natural. Anyway, I thought I would quickly move on to this other girl that I had in mind, but the more time I spent with her, the more I realized I didn't want to go out with her, and then I figured out a way to find out how she felt about me without telling her how I felt about her, at all, and found out she didn't really like me in that way, but that doesn't hurt anyway because I was already pretty much "over" her, anyway. But back to Teresa, even if I didn't "love" her, I did "like" her, kinda... And I tried to "love" her. And so, this still hurts. Sometimes, I blame her for not giving this more of a chance, and I feel angry. I mean, I really tried to make this work, and she... didn't. But would it have worked, anyway? We have a lot of differences. Mainly the fact that she is very "complacent" whereas I prefer to "rock the boat". Anyway, I think part of the problem now is that I don't have a new gf, but I want one, and so I'm feeling kinda lonely. Who likes being single?! Honestly! I don't even have any "crushes" which would at least provide me with a "mission" and keep me excited about future prospects. But no... Well, except for this one girl that I kinda like, but she is more of a long-term prospect and I'm not going to mention her on this blog, at all! Too risky! But some of you know who I'm talking about. Anyway, I've established a few standards for my next gf:
I've also planned out my life, pretty much for the next couple of years: In 2007, I will work till June or so. I hope to make just over $10k. Then, I will take a TESOL course and then go to teach English in Asia or something for at least 6 months. Fall 2008, I will take a year of Economics at Concordia in order to get some of the qualifications I need for Systems Science. Summer 2009, I will do a co-op term. They could probably find me a placement in Ottawa, working for the Feds or something. Then, I will work full-time whilst studying Systems Science Part-time for a year and a half. Then I'll work full time and do my Thesis part-time. Then, I may or may not do an MBA at HEC and then I'll go to the US. Hopefully, at some point, I'll find a woman to be my companion and we'll live it up in NC, sipping long-island ice-tea all day every week-end... Yea.... So, that's what I have to say for now... I guess I kinda kept changing the subject like a 14-year-old girl. Maybe I'm inspired by Joel's sister's and her friend's spaces or something... w/e. Anyway, I got to get ready to go to work now. I switched shifts with someone and now I get to start at 10 instead of 8, which rocks because traffic during rush hour (7 to 8 AM) in West Gatineau is a nightmare! When I started at 8, I had to leave before 7, even though I live less than 15k from work! Keep trucking, y'all! ~ Jonas "THE STEAMROLLER" Graham, esq., B.A., U.E. 7月18日 What is my world view?
What age do I act?
6月29日 Check it out!!!OMG!!! Check this out! It's the best MSN Space EVER!!!!
Seriously, I must admit: my Space is pretty awesome! Even though, I didn't meet my goal for updates, I've been making up for it recently by adding a lot of new posts and I've spent a lot of time changing the layout, adding to my lists and adding more photos. So.... enjoy, y'all!
Shucks! I'm AWESOME!
~ Jonas "THE STEAMROLLER" Graham B.A. U.E.
6月13日 F***ing A! I got a f***ing B.A.!Read it and weep: That's right, y'all! This mofacko got a B.A. The University of Ottawa really lowered the bar! And Cum Laude too! They don't let just any riff-raff get that! My graduation ceremony was awesome. Michaelle Jean, the governor general received an honorary doctorate and made a huge speach about culture and the need to protect it and stuff and I got to shake her hand! The rector asked me what I am going to do next and I told him that I have no idea yet. To be honest, that is the truth. I've got to get a job for now and make some money but who knows what I'm going to do after that. I was thinking maybe Systems Science or something but I need time to decide. Afterwards, my mom just kept mentionning how proud she was of me and stuff. I'm proud of me too. 19 years old! Gee fucking whiz! Now, I have heard (in University, no less) that a University degree doesn't actually prove anything, that it's just a way for respectable white middle-class families to ensure that their children retain the same status. Since we live in a meritocracy we don't believe in discriminating against people because they don't come from the right family, as was the practice in 19th century Britain. So, instead, we invented the B.A. which was just challenging enough to ensure that retards couldn't pass but the main challenge was the cost which only middle-class parents could afford, therefore acting as a barrier to social mobility. So, basically, it was an aristocracy in disguise. Since we discriminated against people based on whether or not they had a B.A., we could ensure that only kids from the right families would have access to middle class prestige without explicitly saying so. However, we paid only $7000 for my B.A. That is totally do-able for many lower-class kids. Of course, they would have to take out a loan, but they could easily pay back anything under $10k. Also, I know many white, middle class kids my age who don't have a B.A., proving that this isn't just a way for middle-class kids to keep their status. This is actually a challenge and only the worthy succeed. In fact, less than 30% of the population of Canada aged 15+ has at least an undergraduate degree and I am now one of them. Go me! Of course, I am so disoriented. Frankly, before, my life was in a straight line. I just kept going in the direction that people expected. Now, I see my whole life ahead of me and I have to make decisions for myself and frankly, it's kind of overwhelming. I haven't been looking for a job as much as I should have. My mom used to really pressure me to get a job ASAP! I found a job and then realized I would hate it so I turned it down. I always told myself that I would do a bunch of things and get myself organized and then I would get a job, but there never seems to be enough time in a day to do all that I want to do, so I end up not doing much and since I work at EKOS practically every night and am out with my friends practically every week-end, I hardly see my mom anymore and she has started to lay off with the pressure. I'm sure she realizes that eventually, I'll come around when I'm ready. But I've got to start picking up the slack and doing what I know I want to get done. Pray for me! God bless y'all!5月22日 Crazy insane or insane crazy?Hello y'all. This is my first major update in quite a while. OK, so as of late, I've finally graduated from University. I have a General B.A. with focus in Business and Terrorist Studies (Arabic). My official ceremony is on June 5 and I graduate Cum Laude (with distinction: meaning I'm better than just any University riff-raff). Now, I'm looking for a job. It sucks. The only thing worse than looking for a job is actually working! I got offered a job a few weeks ago with decent pay, but I turned it down because it was in Kanata. Can you blame me? Kanata's a hole! So now, I am looking again. I have set standards for myself: I am not taking a job that I'll hate, I'm not taking a job that's too far away or in a terrible location and I'm not taking a job that pays less than $500 per week (for up to 42 hours - if it's more than 42 hrs/wk, it will have to pay more). I thought about moving out but for now, since my relationship with my parents is good, I think I might stay at home and use the money that would otherwise go to rent to save up for cool things such as a motor scooter, a mac mini, iPod Nano, travelling to awesome places, further schooling, etc. The problem with renting is that I'd have to find roommates and probably be locked into a 12-month lease which is not cool if I want to have the freedom to quit my job or I would have to have friends who are moving out too and I could work out a deal with them, but alas! I don't. But I think I'll take a cheap summer sublet next year (it's too late, this year). Anyway, I calculated how I will spend my finances and I will have about $300 per pay to put away, so that's pretty sweet! I also won't have much taxes since I don't intend on working a full year. I'll probably work like 6,5 months this year and 8 months next year so I'm still poor as far as the government knows because my annual salary which is calculated January to January is still low. However, I still will have to pay some taxes but I come out ahead. I don't feel like going on to grad school or anyhing just yet, despite the fact that my degree is practically worthless on its own. But when I do, I think I might go into Systems Science. It's a pretty obscure subject but it seems to be just my thing. The only two universities that I know of that offer it are uOttawa and Oregon State. As much as the weather might be nice in Oregon, uOttawa grad school tuition is sooooo cheap so I think I might go there. Here's a little break-down of exciting events that I've been up to, lately: Trip to Montreal: On Saturday, May 13, me and Joel took advantage of this trip to the 514 organized by the Lebanese Culture Club at uOttawa. It was $17 for return transportation, so we figured for that price, one can't afford NOT to go to Montreal, and one could do whatever they wanted once in the city. It was awesome. We went up Mont Royal where we met Ronald McDonald and got super lost. Then, we went to China Town and ate at a Chinese restaurant. We got a little confused because they said for $7 (tax in) we could take this metal dish and eat at the buffet. We thought this meant we could eat at the buffet and then take a second helping to go. But no, aparently, for that price, we could only fill up the metal dish and leave and they got SUPER mad at us for doing otherwise. In the end, we had to pay the difference ($2,15 each) which was fine, but this lady really lost her temper over this and was not diplomatic about it AT ALL. She really needs to learn to calm down and treat customers better. But the food was pretty good, anyway. We also went to mass at St-Patrick's Basilica (in Montreal). Apparently, that's where my maternal grandmother got married. Then, we smoked Houka at this really sketchy place near Concordia. There was fast food on the bottom floor. The pictures made it not look too appealing but I'm sure that is just a front. On the 2nd floor, one can sit down at a table and smoke houka while watching some Arab TV without audio, instead there was some Shakira song. It was fun trying to imagine how the audio and the video could go together (i.e. pretending the Arab TV show was a music video for the song). On the top floor, was a vacant apartment and the door was wide open and we didn't know what it was so we just went on up. When we got the houka, we had to meet him in this back room. Anyway, I'm sure if we asked, we could have gotten Opium or Crack in our houka. But it was a decent price: $6! Houka is sooooo relaxing. It's amazing tobacco can do so much! Adolf's: Sunday, May 14, I went to Barrymore's (henceforth referred to as Adolf's) with Joel, Jan and Princess Teresa. I ended up getting kicked out because I jokingly asked this bartender if I could drink these unattended drinks that were sitting on a table. He got all serious about it and he's like: "No. If you do that I'll kick you out!" Thinking he's a bit of a shmuck/stiffly-stifferson, I ask for the other bar-tender the next time I go to order a drink. Anyway, the Shmuck bartender decides that this means I've had enough and should be kicked out. Which is a bit of an over-reaction, in my opinion, and it confirmed my initial presumptions about the guy. Anyway, I don't think I'd go back to Adolf's anyway. The drinks are expensive. The place is a whole and they didn't play any MJ on 80's night! Afterward's I went to an interweb Cafe to look up Teresa's cell # which she had sent me in an e-mail so I could phone her up and tell her what happened. Anyway, we did manage to meet up again and we went to Subway where I got the Sandwich of the day and the Subway guy completely understood. I asked him what he thought of the situation, didn't mention that it was at Barrymore's and before I could finish, he was like: "You got kicked out of Barrymore's, didn't you?!" Amazing! Apparently, he had gotten kicked out of Adolf's before, too. Everybody gets kicked out. I wonder how they can still make money despite kicking everyone out. I mean they ARE the sole venue for many shows but there are other places in Ottawa and so if they're not careful, bands might chose other bars that are less Nazi-ish. Oh well, now I have a bad-ass rep: I can tell people that I've been kicked out of a bar, before. So they will be like: "Oh Jonas, you're such a bad-ass!" Something that I found kind of interesting: Chinese people don't laugh, or just not as much as we do. Joel sent me this program that allows one to see TV stations from around the world. Anyway, I was watching something on CCTV-9 (fascist PRC's English channel) and they had this Oprah-like show and the guest was telling some funny anecdote to which the audience just sat and stared, it was just weird. Well, there is so much I could talk about but I am getting tired of writing just as y'all are getting tired of reading sooo instead I'll list a bunch of goals that y'all can hold me too. Some of them relate to my life and some of them to my blog, specifically. Personal goals:
Blog goals:
Here are some topics I might write about in the future:
Well, that's about all I have to say for now. Take care and God bless y'all! - Jonas "THE STEAMROLLER" Graham 3月18日 Boring update'Sup y'all! Here's whats going on with me:
9月18日 Dammit! THIS F*CKING HURTS!!!Maybe they are called wisdom teeth for a reason... Perhaps because it would be wise to LEAVE THEM IN THERE! Seriously, I have been in constant pain since the operation. I was surprised on Thursday that my cheeks didn't swell up. Then, just to smite me, the day after, they do. And they're still swollen and my jaw hurts and I can't open my mouth more than a few centimetres wide and I'm constantly worried about getting an infection or "dry sockets" or something. And oh... the Tylenol 3 doesn't really help ease the pain, it just makes me so stoned that I care less... I'm honestly starting to question whether it was worth it. I mean it cost my father $1400 (granted the insurance is picking up all but about $200 of that) and then I get days of pain for what? a few less teeth? But then again the time I got the consultation with the other Dentist he did say that there was like 2 with "cysts" and one that was "impacted" but still how bad can that be? My parents never got their wisdom teeth removed and Noah didn't either, but he suffered excruciating pain because of it. I guess I don't have it so bad. I mean it hurts but it's not like "Ahhhh!!!! Please kill me now!" kind of pain. You know what? Imma quit complaining and go to sleep. Which reminds me: I've got to set my alarm for 2 so I can take my anti-biotics on time!   Keep truckin' y'all! 9月16日 I am soooo stoned right now....As I am on Tylenol 3, and still under the influence of the anasthetic, since I got my wisdom teeth extracted today. apparently, i was saying something in arabic as i woke up but everyone got confused so i switched to german! mdr. but i don't remember it. Have fun, y'all!7月4日 KILL!!!Hey sportsfans!
Yesterday, a funny/weird/unfortunate thing happened. But first, a little set up...
Y'all know how I'm not the most macho of men... I'm kinda intellectual, borderline metro but too lazy to fret too much bout my appearance, but I mean, like, I'm *sensitive* and what-not... Well, I'm still a man, you know and I try to show that when I get the opportunity and take the opportunity to show off the masculine attributes that i have.
Well, yesterday was a perfect opportunity. My mother screamed. There was a mouse in the kitchen. I ran up to help. I begged my mom: " please let me kill it! PLEASE!!!" My testerone was running wild, my mind was all going... KILL KILL KILL!!!!! But by the time I got there, the mouse had scurried under the sink and into a hole or something!
Damn! Killing is not all action! It can be boring. Anyway,the mouse got away and I was pretty disappointed but by this point I was soooo riled up and I was like "DAMN! I'VE GOT TO KILL SOMETHING!!!" Jajaja... just kidding! Happy Fourth, y'all! 5月1日 [insert interesting anecdote here]Wassup, e-friends! This entry will not be about what I think or my crazy opinions. This one is about my life. Here's what's been going on as of late:
4月19日 Assets and LiabilitiesI am a fucking genius but when it comes to manual labour and stuff, I'm slow and often fuck up. That's actually one of my main problems: I'm slow. I do good quality work but it takes me longer than others. I'm good at designing systems. I like to take an organization I deal with in everyday life and say: "Hmmm... If I were in charge, this is how I would organize things. For example, the school system: what should the student know by such an age, how many hours per week would she go to class, what courses would she take and in what grade, etc. I do this for fun. Yeah. I know it's weird too. I don't know what that is exactly, this systems-design thing cause if I did, thats definately what I'd major in. I've been told that it's kinda like Urban planning but I want to plan more than just cities. I enjoy making websites and tweaking my computer and stuff. I used to be REALLY into computers. I was going to go into software engineering but I lost interest over time because a lot of my ideas had been done already and I was gradually losing interest. Plus, the hi-tech collapse didn't help! I'm charming (in a way), I'm kinda funny, gentle, affectionate and sensitive. I can sing fairly well. Likes and dislikesI love languages! I speak English at home. I learned French by going to a french elementary school when I was young. I want to get fluent in Arabic and Spanish and possibly Mandarin. I don't really like Canada. It's cold and boring and it's not like we have something awesome going for us, like the Netherlands. I'd like to live somewhere a little warmer and where the government policies are more to my liking. I like a challenge! I don't do math anymore, but when I did, it used to be so fun cause I like to use my mind to chunk through a problem step-by-step and finally end up with the right answer! It's a sweet victory! I like good-looking clothes but I don't like to spend a lot of money on them. My rule of thumb is: There's me and the indonesian labourer who made these clothes. She's already making just 25c per hour. Lets not both get ripped off! I like girls. Currently, I am single but looking (passively). I would like a girl who's as smart as me. I'm not too picky when it comes to looks: no facial hair, a little fat is OK but not too much, brunettes are my favourite. I'd like a girl with a sense of humour who's kinda silly but not COMPLETELY "Out there".
I enjoy spending time alone. I have friends but I don't feel like constantly making sure that one of my friends also wants to do what I want to do. For example, if I want to see a movie but my friends don't, then fine! I'll see it alone. I hate Chess but I love checkers. And Backgammon and Monopoly. I love air hockey. I love biking. It's a fun, albeit slow, way to get somewhere with so many advantages. Sometimes I also like to go cross-country skiing, hiking, play football, soccer, basketball, go skating, etc. I love Kraft Dinner, Shawarmas, pizza and Coca-Cola I hate coffee but I sometimes take pep pills to help me stay awake. In terms of music, I like mainstream stuff. I think that most underground stuff is probably underground for a reason. I don't know what drugs I'd have to take to enjoy hard-core or scream-core or grind-core or emo or screamo or whatever. It's annoying. I like Michael Jackson, Avril Lavigne and O-Town. I like some Hip-hop and R&P like the Black Eyed Peas and R. Kelly. I like some country like Alabama and Shania Twain. I like some rock like Nickelback. I like little pieces of practically every genre. I like some old school stuff like Tommy Roe, Chuck Berry, The Beach Boys, etc. I even like Aqua and Hansen. Basically, I like happy music! I like to watch Family Guy, King of the Hill, CSI, House and Dateline. My favourite genre of movies is comedy. Especially Romantic or drug-related comedies. I don't like action films. I like Jesus. I'm Roman Catholic but I have a huge respect for Islam. I like money but I also don't like to work. I'm trying to find a way to make the most money whilst working the least amount possible. Plans for the futureIn 10 years, I hope to be finishing up my MBA after teaching English in Asia, having travelled around much of the world, having found a better country to live in and perhaps having done a second Bachelors degree in Economics. Eventually, I want to settle down and live the American dream. I want to work at a job where I use my language and Business skills. Naturally, I want to travel a lot. I want to have a wife, three kids, a dog and a gorgeous house in the suburbs. |
|
|
